Following the collapse of their present sponsorship deal with Sahara India Parivar, the BCCI have announced that permahaired Republican presidential cardigan Mitt Romney will become the new financial partner of Indian cricket. Romney, whose wealth is estimated to be 'equal to or even greater' than that of Ravindra Jadeja, has signed a $40m deal which will see his prematurely embalmed face emblazoned across the shirts of all IPL players apart from Mitchell Johnson, who the Mormon ex-Massachusetts governor has specifically requested bowl his overs in a 'Gingrich 2012!' tank top whilst reading aloud from Going Rogue, the subtle
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